Post Coital Tristesse - Facts You Must Know About it
The coitus was great, but after everything is over, why do you feel so sad and depressed? If you feel like fleeing or if you need some reassuring physical contact after intercourse, you might be suffering from a psychological condition called 'post-coital tristesse' (PTC)
What does it mean?
Post-coital is a Latin phrase while tristesse is a French word which literally translates to “sadness”. If you suffer from PCT, you might experience intense feelings of uneasiness, anxiety or sorrow immediately after coitus, or even two hours later.
Why does it happen?
- There are specific hormonal changes during sex and immediately after it. Two main hormones involved are ‘dopamine’ and ‘prolactin’. Dopamine is a neuro-hormone that precedes the release of adrenaline and is linked with feelings of pleasure and sexual arousal; while prolactin is the hormone responsible for producing milk in women (men secrete it as well). Dopamine is released in copious amounts during sex, so to counter this, prolactin is released. Prolactin drastically reduces dopamine levels, and this can make you sad.
- The other cause is psychological. Under the influence of dopamine, you might end up saying things you regret later. This too can result in sadness and depression.
Is it different for men and women?
Yes, men and women handle PCT very differently. Men feel like leaving so that they feel less sad. On the other hand, some men choose to stay, which only worsens their condition. It makes them associate sex with melancholic feelings. Women, on the other hand, crave for reassurance and physical touch from their partners. Nice words or cuddling can ease their discomfort. Suffering from this might result in disaster for them. When the man flees and the woman needs reassurance, it will lead to negative feelings about sex and development of resentment for each other.
Can abstinence and avoidance help?
Abstinence can help if you do not have an active sex life. Time away from sex can actually help you understand your problems better. However, abstinence can trigger depression, low self-esteem and extreme emotions of loneliness.
Are there any other solutions?
Communication and therapy are traditionally the best treatments for PCT. Talking to a therapist, alone or together with your partner, can help you with a solution.