Social Phobia - How To Overcome It?

Anxiety often leads to the development of phobias. An unreasonable fear of being in social situations is known as social anxiety or social phobia. People suffering from such a phobia may be afraid of specific social settings like public speaking or generic social events such as eating with others or using public telephones. They are afraid that they will embarrass themselves or be humiliated, in front of others. Being in such a situation can often build up into a panic attack. In many cases, the person himself is aware that his fear is irrational but cannot overcome it. Hence, here are a few tips to overcome social phobia-

1. Relax: The first thing you need to do is learn to relax. People with phobias often anticipate them and stress themselves out before the situation can present itself. Being anxious heightens sensitivity and worsens your response to a social situation. Hence, before stepping out or meeting someone, take a deep breath and relax. Instead of focusing on the stressful situation, think about something in the future like getting home to a nice cup of tea.
2. Test yourself: Make a list of the situations that you are afraid of and anticipate the level of anxiety you think it would cause. Then test this hypothesis by putting yourself in the situation. For example, if you fear walking into a crowded room, try doing it once. You may find that you cope with the situation better then you anticipated. Keep a record of these hypothesis and test results.
3. Practice doing what scares you: Some situations may scare you too much to dive straight into them. In such cases, practice what you would do if you were in such a situation by yourself or with someone you trust. Run the situation in your head and imagine what you would do, if it were actually happening.
4. Look around: Social awkwardness is often caused by imaging that people can read your thoughts and thus focusing on them rather than the people you are talking to or the space you are in. Train your mind to notice things around you and be aware of your situation. Focusing outwards can lower your anxiety and enhance your ability to hold a conversation with people. To make this a habit, whenever you walk into a room make a mental note of three things in the room.
5. Ask questions: An easy way to shift focus from yourself to people around you is by asking questions. When you ask someone a question listen to their response and if you still aren't comfortable talking about your own views, ask another related question. This will not give your mind time to dwell on any negative thoughts and can even increase your social circle.