Dr. Poosha Darbha -Sexologist-HYD-ONLINE ONLY.

Know how Premature ejaculation can affect your sex life and its treatment

Hi I'm Poosha, Sexologist and Sex Counsellor and a Consultant at Lybrate.com. We'll talk about very frequently asked question about a sexual function, that is, premature ejaculation.

Not too many people are familiar with this word, rather they would describe their problem as rapid ejaculation. Mere pati ko takat nahi hai, stamina nahi hai, such are the kind of descriptions we come across and the real problem is the male concerned is not able to withstand intercourse for more than one or upto two minutes. Sometimes, they ejaculate within one minute. It is calculated from the time of intromission, it is inserting the penis inside, to ejaculating the time is either less than one minute or slightly around one minute. And premature ejaculation is a very very common male dysfunction, probably the most common male sexual dysfunction without any bodily cause. So utimately what we see is if the male is ejaculating much earlier than the female and earlier than he wishes to then we consider it as a case of premature ejaculation.

So, a lot of people think that this premature ejaculation is a disorder or disease which it is not. And secondly, many people attribue this to their past habits and they call it bad habits, "curse" put in quotes. So, they describe their problem as doctor I've masturbated during my childhood or in my adulthood and now I've this curse of premature ejaculation, I'm unable to satisfy my wife, she is very unhappy with me, I'm afraid she might even leave me and all. So they attribute the thing that this is the cause that they have masturbated in the past that's why the problem occurs, which again isn't correct. Actually masturbation doesn't cause premature ejaculation, on the contrary you can use masturbation as a tool to overcome premature ejaculation, you can change yourself using that. Whether they're anxious people whether they've any psychological disorders earlier, what is their family background, what is the relationship between the male and the female, the wife and the husband, how do they interact with each other, how do they take the problem, are they hostile or are they anxious, are they stressed out. Is the marriage is in distess or are they quarreling, is there good communication, do they love and care each other despite this problem all these things we've to assess first. So, based on this assessment we choose the method of treatment.

We've two methods, one is the natural method where in we'll train the couple to first understand how the premature ejaculation is taking place and then how to control it. Similarly, ejaculatory control is very difficult and initially it seems impossible but then as weeks pass by we learn each and every technique piece by piece and with experience they'll be able to overcome premature ejaculation and they'll be able to enjoy sex for several minutes. I know people who have been able to enjoy sex beyond 10 minutes, 20 minutes but let me not quote any higher minutes because they're rare instances. So, this is based on natural methods which require a good cooperation and understanding between the couple, and that is very important. But when the couple is in distress or if the natural method is something they're not able to learn and implement easily then we go for or choose Firm Classical treatment or Drug treatment.

There are a number of drugs which sometimes can be applied physically, outside the skin or there are drugs that can be taken through mouth that can solve the problem. But they're short lived, as long as they're used then only they work and after stopping the medicines again the problem returns. But what we do is while they're learning, while they're enjoying their sexual life it increases their intramission period we teach them the natural techniques so that the techniques will remain for a very long time and they can enjoy their lives. So anyone who is having a premature ejaculation problem should not be distressed. They should understand that this is a very natural, very normally occuring phenomenon and this can be easily resolved through either medicines or natural methods or a combination of both.

So the best thing they should do to help them get results is to consult a sex therapist as soon as they can so the marriage doesn't fall into distress.

Here are symptoms, causes, myth and treatment of Night Emission

Hi I am Poosha sex counsellor and sexologist. Friends, a lot people are worried about the emissions, ejaculations happening during the sleep time. These are called sleep emissions, nocturnal emissions, and nocturnal ejaculations or in common practice nightfall. Ejaculations do not occur for women but nocturnal orgasms do occur for girls and women also. Clearly this happens because external tensions build up inside the body and there is no relief mechanism there is no way out like no opportunity to participate in sex or even it is participated there is still much more need and desire. In such cases usually nightfall happens. Also there is a physiological basis for this one nocturnal emissions probably happen in a way it’s a nature’s way of testing its actual mechanisms.

Like take the example of a pressure cooker its steam builds up inside pressure comes out in the form of steam. So also when this actual pressure keeps building inside you the semen is ejaculated. As if through voluntary exercises like masturbation but if that is not there through sleep. There is nothing wrong about it. Nothing is lost. People are afraid that semen is lost. No semen will never be lost because semen production is an everyday process. It’s ok that a lot of people who experience nocturnal emissions almost every day or some people who experience it once in a month or twice in a month. There are people who get night, nocturnal emissions probably once or twice in an entire year and I can assure you I can tell you there are people who saw any night emissions at all. Everything is normal every frequency is normal. If they think it is excessive what they should do is stop thinking so much about sex.

Whenever sexual thoughts come you don’t stop the thoughts because they are natural for that age for any as it matter. But if the thoughts are bothering let the mind be diverted into something that is equally interesting which is a non-sexual thing. Think about education, think about games, think about sports, think about going to a movie, think about GOD or whatever interests you, think about scenic beauties, hobbies, anything. By diverting your mind into both directions where sexual thoughts are little reduced.

So people ask me what is the treatment for nocturnal emissions. There is no treatment there is no need for any treatment because it’s a natural phenomenon. Don’t try to interfere in nature’s ways. And remember nocturnal emissions will go away on their own. Once married there won’t be any nocturnal emissions at all except probably when his wife is away or is not in a position to participate in sex once in a while they may occur and as advance as the nocturnal emissions frequency will come down drastically and early people very rarely experienced that one. It doesn’t deplete anything it doesn’t come in the way of reduction in sexual life in any way. God has created that the nature has created that accept it as it is.

Good luck to you.

Effects of Masturbation

Hi! I am Dr. Poosha, sexologist and sex counselor. I am also the editor of the India’s longest published magazine in Absarika published from 1949. I am also a consultant on Lybrate.com for the last 15 months.

Friends, today we will talk about masturbation. This is a solitary practice as you can understand done in privacy and it starts at the age of about 8 to 9 years in boys. It can also start as late as 50 years for some people, until then they may not be starting masturbation at all. So the occurrence of masturbation can start at any time from childhood till the late age. Unlike many people think, women also masturbate. Lots of people and qualified doctors propagate that masturbation leads to impotence, immature ejaculation, causes nervous disability, general weakness and stop the growth of the penis which make the organ small. Some people also believe that the penis becomes small because of masturbation. These are some of the terrible misconception by the public. There are some people who go to the extent of saying that masturbation is the cause of epilepsy, insanity, schizophrenia also. But believe me, every single one of them is a myth and absolutely wrong and there is no scientific basis for this at all.

In fact, masturbation is not only a natural and safe outlet without any hazards to the health including sexual health, life, performance, desires and responses. None of them is affected by masturbation. In fact, there are some benefits as well. In the first place, it gives you the sexual satisfaction that you desire at any given age. Secondly, it relieves you of the sexual tensions building up in the body so that you are able to focus on your studies or work or other things. More importantly, you will be safe from sexually transmitted infections that could arise if you indulge in casual sex. For casual sex, other consequences are also there like cultural, biological and psychological. All these problems can be avoided if you stick to masturbation. Finally, it saves you from prostatic problems.

If masturbation is done by elderly people especially, the prostate symptoms, infections and enlargement signs can be relieved. For persons of every age, masturbation can be used as a tool for overcoming premature ejaculation. So remember that masturbation is harmless and here is nothing wrong in doing it. But I have come across a lot of people who says that they are addicted to masturbation. We will discuss about this issue at some other time.

Thank you, I practice in Samalkot and Hyderabad. You can walk into my clinic if you have any queries on this subject and I also answer questions through lybrate.com so you can fix up an appointment through lybrate. You can ask your questions and get text, video or written answers.