Please tell me the name of a numbing gel/cream I really don't want to feel any pain for first time intercourse I want to use it for the first time. I am a virgin and married. I want to use numbing gel/cream to numb hymen ONLY FOR FIRST TIME so that my partner can penetrate and after that we will start proper intercourse after 20-30 min when my hymen will become normal, I don't want any suggestions that "first time it will pain" "don't be afraid, try long foreplay" etc. Because we have tried all but whenever he tries to penetrate I feel lot of pain so we stop. My married life is in danger please please I beg you help me tell me name of a numbing gel/cream to numb my hymen only for first time. Hope someone will understand my situation and tell me name of gel or cream.

Dr. Kirti LohanGeneral Physicianyrs exp

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Hi lybrate-user, Understand the situation Whether the first time or the millionth your vagina is no different, it?s designed to have sex without pain as when aroused it will relax, lubricate, open and increase in size, as it?s flexible it will also stretch to accommodate a penis and then return to normal after sex.� Most commonly if sex hurts the first time it is due to the woman not being ready, either not emotionally ready so tensing-up or not physically ready so not aroused enough for penetration. This means penetration is forced, causing pain and damage which increases risk of STDs and infection, your vagina is not designed to make sex unpleasant or harmful, it?s designed for pleasure.� Use more foreplay, ideally orgasm at least once before intercourse, and use lubrication if/when needed, go slowly and communicate with your partner. Enjoy sex without penetration for a while and if that develops into intercourse, if he can slide himself easily into you during foreplay then carry on like that - allow some natural progression, rather than stopping and saying 'Now it is time for penetration' take pressure off by letting it happen naturally.� The only possible difference to your vagina would be if your hymen is intact - which is rare as by the time you have sex it?s likely to have worn away, stretched or torn from foreplay or masturbation ? sex doesn?t necessarily tear your hymen as it can stretch, even if it tears it doesn?t always hurt. If you believe the myth that sex hurt the first time then you NEED to educate yourself a lot more about how your vagina works and about sex before you have sex, these are basic things someone of your age and someone who is about to have sex should know. Learn how to prevent possible pain rather than accepting it as inevitable, because it's really not. If you are nervous then this will also help ease those nerves (nerves can make sex painful) because you'll know what to expect and how to prevent problems such as pain during sex - knowledge combats fear.� Dear, reason I am not suggesting you any numbing cream because it would be dangerous as you can't feel when damage is being done - this means you cannot stop him when he's causing you harm, so he may cause even more harm putting you at higher risk of infection and STD's, also when the numbing cream wears off the pain may remain.� If you want you can use lubricant but avoid numbness cream Thanks.  

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