2 years back I faced betrayal from one of my colleague in office due to which I suffered generalized anxiety disorder. I was prescribed nexito plus for 5 months and I got completely cured. 2 years no issues. This year in feb again I started getting anxiety due to call from same friend. I was managing it without any medicine. I used to go through some of the confession pages of company where ppl write all kind of dark confession like their extra marital affair or the affair before marriage and all. I started putting myself in that place due to anxiety and thought what if same thing happen with me. What if my partner hide things from me. I started getting anxious. I started imagining that what if she had anyone before me and all. We are together for 9 years and I never had these thoughts till date but yes I was very possessive for her. I was never comfortable around her male friend. They were never close but nowadays I am started thinking what if someone has touch her which is not true as I am aware of everything. She is one of the best person anyone can have in life. She is most simple and down to earth person and that is why I am feeling terrible and disgusted why even I am getting this thought. I am feeling ashamed and guilty of myself. I am getting afraid that this should not make be sick so much that I loose her and my family. I cannot live a single moment without her. She is my whole world.

Dear Lybrate user, it is very unfortunate that due to your colleague's betrayal you had to suffer so much with anxiety and now his return has triggered further anxiety and you are having all this mixed, conflicting thoughts about your own wife/partner. Can you kindly consult a counseling psychologist in your area, it shall be the most advisable thing at this point. You are going into thought distortion and though your heart and mind are telling you that your thoughts are not right but it is not late that with passing time, very unassociated events you will pick up and join to create the fear as reality. You have a wonderful partner you have to shed off any/or all negative distorted thoughts that come to your mind. Because the repercussions shall be huge: your relationship shall be affected the most, your partner shall be deeply hurt and miserable is not' it? And you do not want this. Do you? Hence a kind suggestion pls communicate with your wife, share what you are going through with regards to your colleague and his return. Extend your need for her help. And I am sure she will understand and support you. This will take away a lot of your fear. Additional counseling will help you to bring constructive changes to your thought pattern, to your life style and approach. -throughout the day try to keep yourself busy in constructive and creative activities -have very little idle time so that unwanted thoughts d not creep in -introduce rigorous exercise like jogging, running, skipping, swimming etc. To release toxins, energise yourself (you can do the same with your wife) -try to meditate and calm yourself, especially focus on breathing exercise (whenever anxiety feeling starts initiate deep breathing it will relax you) -spend or invest time in your areas of interest which you left because of work like music, painting, sports, etc. Your objective is to counter the wrong thoughts. You shall be fine have faith in yourself.  

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Where there is perfect love, there is no fear. Because you are so afraid, you will be very suggestible. You will also tend to believe in your fantasies and may be prompted to act from that belief. Your insecurity stems from some experience in your life that has made you vulnerable to fear/anxiety and will become quite suggestible. You must meet with a counsellor and talk about your emotions and deal with fear completely both with past and future related issues. Mere use of medication will not suffice and must be combined with counselling to get the best results. If your wife is all of what you say she is, then trust her and live in genuine love. By suspicion, you may destroy an otherwise good relationship. Before that happens to go for therapy and work out all your fears, real and unreal thoroughly.  

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