Hi, I'm a 20 years old college student, depressed since 2 years. Life was normal when used to go school. cause, I hardly used to spend time with my family. But, the whole scenario had changed from the day I started going college. And it's not studies, it's my parents who, I don't know expects WHAT from me. I have siblings and cousins who earns good and are enjoying their life to the fullest now. I even have a younger cousin and my aunt always compares Me with her every time, in front of guest in front of neighbours and the sad part is my parents do nothing but just laugh with them. I feel like I am in a competition competing with my siblings and cousin, when they are praised and everybody laughs at me. Not body supports me not my mother, father not even my real sisters. They never did guide me ever. They literally laugh at me when I do something wrong and my parents scold me and always try to make numbers by showing me the real culprit. And I know, it's not there fault, my parents don't trust me enough to believe me. I feel like nobody's there for me. My life is so depressing. I feel like killing myself:(My life is a big NO NO. No matter whatever I do, I know, my parents won't take my side, ever ever ever. I know you must be thinking, no way a parent can be like this. they don't like me but life is all about adjusting and I've tried to adjust it since years and now I can't, I repeat, I can't take this anymore. Please advise.
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Hi. You are feeling lonely, helpless and unsupported due to the reasons you have mentioned. Yes, one does expect their near and dear ones to stand by them and it can be painful when that doesn't happen. Grades and numbers seem to be the only criteria of a person's worthiness for some. But there is so much more to a person than just grades. It's hard but try to ignore comments that are hurting you, instead try to focus on your strengths and things that you enjoy doing. If you find the unnecessary comparisons as a source of discounting and disregard then do let the concerned person know how it makes you feel and you would not like to hear such things. After you have shared your feeling let go of the emotions and focus on what you would like to do in life. Also notice if you are feeling insecure due to the change from a more controlled and directive school environment to a slightly more liberal college environment. The change can also be unnerving for some because there is alot many things different than school setup. Do you have friends with whom you can share your feelings and opinions? you can consult a counsellor if things appear too difficult. Don't try to ignore the problem under the pretext of adjustment, it will only make things worse. Speak up for yourself.
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Dear lybrate-user, I know nobody likes comparison with others. You can beat it, by excelling in another aspect where you are more talented. For all these, your negative attitude will not help. You are using in your thinking many global words like no one, no body, no no, ever ever, etc. You should question yourself whether it is a fact or your thought. It may be your thought only which you are confusing as fact. In the world, everything happens 100% is rare. Like that never happens 0% is also rare. When you think of rare things, you will be rarely right. Since you feel like killing yourself, it is better that you come on online consultation and treatment. Or tell your parents to take you to psychiatrist or clinical psychologist. You may be given antidepressant tablets and/or talk therapy. With treatment your attitude about your family will change. Please remember that your were fine in school days in the same family since your attitude was not so negative at that time.
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