Hi Dr. My problem is that I have a bf almost 4 years r going to complete for our relationship. He too loved me a lot n care for me. He never had forced me or ask me for physical relationship. He's in civil engineering in 1st year diploma. He talked me whole day whenever I msg him he talks to me. But The problem is that 15 days 20 days becomes n we don't meet. I really wanna see him whenever I see others couples I feel sad. I always ask him to meet he ignores or he changed the topic otherwise he start irritating me n laughed for no reason n I get irritated then we both fight and than it leads to misunderstanding. I know he is busy but I wan him to meet me spent little time with me ones in a week or ones in 15 days. When he refuses I get hurt n start crying I think a lot on this matter and than I can't concentrate on my studies. He really a good guy I know please give advice how can I make him realize? Thank you.
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I am sure he may have some reasons for not meeting you. I don't think it has anything to do with not liking you. Maybe he is a bit of a shy guy. Or he could be worried about been seen in public for many family reasons. Whatever it is, it is better to have a frank talk with him instead of getting hurt so easily. Yes, it is true that you must meet periodically and share some bonding time together. But he seems to be a nice guy and he has not got physical with you though he cannot if he is not meeting you! I don't know if you have never met at all! That would be odd indeed. So, ask him what is his problem and then you can find a solution. If he is not forthcoming with an honest answer, then he has something to hide and that raises a lot of questions. Communication is very important for a relationship, and so this must be conveyed to him and an answer sought.
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First of all you have to understand one thing that its very crucial time for career to both of you, you should focus on long term objectives rather than focusing on short term objective But on your side you are not wrong every one wants to spend time with their loved ones infact you love him so much that inspite of not meeting him regularly you are able to continue such a beautiful relation this shows the deepness of your love because now a days with decreasing moral values many relations are ending in 1or 2 years. Now lets come to your problem talk to your boyfriend normally and say your feelings and say him that you want to discuss this matter ,listen his problems and try to convince him but don't be in agressive mood listen him patiently, both of you can take help of counsellor also. If you need my help you can contact me. Take care.
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