I am a student who stays in hostel. I feel depressed when I come back from home Every time when holiday's are over. Why?

Question

Dear Lybrate User, I think you are feeling sad and homesick. You are not depressed. It appears to me that, since your childhood, you have stayed at home, along with your loved ones, who took good care of you, who loved you. Because of all this love and care, you probably felt secure and safe at home. All your basic needs of food, water, shelter, love and care were met easily. Now in the hostel, you may not be liking the food, or the place, or the people around you. You are missing the love and care also. You might be feeling little insecure and/or unsafe. It is also possible that you do not feel very comfortable in the hostel. You have developed a bond with your own people and your home. Leaving that is not very easy. You are missing all this. Try to connect with your loved ones as often as possible. Share your progress, feelings with them. I would like you to understand, what made you stay in a hostel? Is it for further studies or job? Also please understand what are you going to achieve by staying away from your family? How long will you be staying away from them like this? If you think, this is temporary, then, you need to tell yourself that probably it may not be possible for you to achieve your goals by staying at home. At the same time, please understand that everything changes with time. As we mature physically and mentally, we need to "let go" of certain comforts in our life, in order to progress. You have also done this before. Try to remember the first day of your school, when you left the comfort of your home and went into a totally new environment of your school - primary then secondary, then college etc. You progressed because you "let go" of the comfort and security of the home for some time. Focus on your goal in life. Decide what you want to become and make efforts in that direction. Your home and the loving and caring people at home are always there for your support. Take that support and go confidently in the direction of your dreams. All the best.

Hemal Sanjay Kunte · Accepted Answer

Dear Lybrate User, I think you are feeling sad and homesick. You are not depressed. It appears to me that, since your childhood, you have stayed at home, along with your loved ones, who took good care of you, who loved you. Because of all this love and care, you probably felt secure and safe at home. All your basic needs of food, water, shelter, love and care were met easily. Now in the hostel, you may not be liking the food, or the place, or the people around you. You are missing the love and care also. You might be feeling little insecure and/or unsafe. It is also possible that you do not feel very comfortable in the hostel. You have developed a bond with your own people and your home. Leaving that is not very easy. You are missing all this. Try to connect with your loved ones as often as possible. Share your progress, feelings with them. I would like you to understand, what made you stay in a hostel? Is it for further studies or job? Also please understand what are you going to achieve by staying away from your family? How long will you be staying away from them like this? If you think, this is temporary, then, you need to tell yourself that probably it may not be possible for you to achieve your goals by staying at home. At the same time, please understand that everything changes with time. As we mature physically and mentally, we need to "let go" of certain comforts in our life, in order to progress. You have also done this before. Try to remember the first day of your school, when you left the comfort of your home and went into a totally new environment of your school - primary then secondary, then college etc. You progressed because you "let go" of the comfort and security of the home for some time. Focus on your goal in life. Decide what you want to become and make efforts in that direction. Your home and the loving and caring people at home are always there for your support. Take that support and go confidently in the direction of your dreams. All the best.