I am facing depression feeling of loneliness suffocation irritation since a long time. I thought when I will move out of my house I will feel better. So I shifted to gurgaon recently for studies. But the situation has become worse. I feel afraid of speaking (though I was a very bubbly girl before) I couldn't make friends. I keep crying silently. I feel lonely bored frustrated n everything worse possible. I am not able to feel happy in any situation. Can you help me?

Ms. Rachna MishraPsychologist6yrs exp

92% (197 ratings)

Ask Free Question

Hie lybrate-user I certainly hope you can visit your parents often. This is a huge transition, standing on your own, supporting yourself. First off congratulations. It is a fast change no matter how slowly its done. Just such a big change. Just hold tight, let those feelings settle in gently and slowly. Don't rush to fix anything, it will all come naturally. A little boredom and loneliness is what is needed right now. You will slowly find yourself drawn to friends and activities when the tine is right. Don't forget the telephone, parents want to hear from you and maybe some old friends. You said you feel jealous of those with losts of free time, well I'm retired and not jealous of those with lots of free time. I'm much too busy with friends and hobbies. Take some time for yourself, be alone, find out who you are and what you are like. You have been so busy growing up and getting a job you probably really have not had time to really get acquainted with yourself. I'm totally serious! Now you did ask me for a reason - right! I'm a meditator. Meditation, just 20 minutes twice daily is just the right amount to allow a busy active life. And that is a GOAL. Exactly, you are missing this simple thing in your life. But here is the thing, having a goal in your life does not give you happiness. Not at all. Probably you had number of goals right at this point of time. The happiness becomes a part of your life when you actually start trying to pursue a goal. Pursuing a goal will give you equal amounts of pain and an equal amounts of happiness. The more the pain you endure during your journey, the more you gonna be HAPPY. And the more worth while this life will look. For example tell me what will give you more happiness when you are offered Pizza for dinner in the following scenarios. You have your routine breakfast, lunch, supper. You are completely full at the time of dinner You have not eaten anything the whole day. If you did not chose 3, then you are trolling me. The 2nd most important thing is your DREAM. You have some dream in your mind. You definitely do. I am quite sure about that. Everyone has one. What are you going to do now is to dream the most extravagant dream. Like you want to be the best rapper, the richest person, the most ripped guy, a dating guru anything. It can be all of them as well. Now start making small goals to achieve this bigger goal. Make a strategy, be completely selfish, make a master plan, don't listen to anybody, don't compromise your dream in any way. Start achieving those small goals and put your heart and life to it. You are going to do only this single task for your whole life. This should be your mindset. Do this.  

1 person found this helpful