I think I'm having depression. I always dream of being at the top of world, if anything doesn't go account to my will I feel my dreams that in future I'll be controlling them. My parents separated 17 years ago, is that also a reason why I feel like it? I have dreams of having sex other sexual relationship with top actresses, pornstars, or any good looking female that I see. I'm also too shy with the outside world feel afraid to speak or perform any action in front of people who I know, except my friends. When I feel lonely I watch porn and masturbate. If someone motivates me to start something I do it only for a few days and the interest is gone.