I been having a lot problems that was said to be more mental disorders. I had a very bad verbal, physical, mental, and emotional abusive 5 year relationship that I stayed homeless in all weather situations and went days at a time with no food. I left him almost 8 months ago but I can't get myself to conversation or socialize with my family or anybody, come out of my room besides to use bathroom I wait to come to eat until everybody is asleep and can't get myself to take showers regularly. When I do leave my house I feel followed and watched all the time, I feel like someone is gonna sneak up on me from behind I worry it will be my ex. I continually believe that I am being listened to spied on and my electronics are being hacked into or something. I jump and jerk over everything, when a hand is just raised or moved out the corner of my eye I dodge and cover my face, someone tosses something I do the same, when someone is arguing I get nervous freaked out I feel anxiety and panic and memories of my abusive relationship, same when someone gets hateful sounding towards me. I always want to be alone at my house but I cry and get scared when I do get left alone wanting one of my friends or family member to at least be in the next room. I have been having bad memory loss, and confusion I got told that Gabapentin caused memory loss, dementia and stuff and I would take over 30 a day almost 20, 000 mg a day of mine and my ex's, I can be driving and my mind go blank and not know where I am and panic then I'll remember a minute or so later, I was doing other drugs through the time as well. I just turned 24 years old I don't know if I can have memory dementia problems. Please tell me what you think?