Why do I always feel like I cannot do it. Always feels inferior, cannot talk to people and my head always heavy thinking about unnecessary things I get nervous very quickly in social situations, Very Less reactive to emotions. I always try to escape from social situations which has branded me as Lazy and inactive. I am tired of people saying YOU TALK SO LESS AND YOU ARE SO INNOCENT. I THINK I AM WASTING MY LIFE ,MISSED SO MANY OPPORTUNITIES of my LIFE. I always tried to change but could not. Even I am anxious to approach a health professional. THE ANXIETY LEVEL HAS INCREASED TENFOLD IN RECENT YEARS. I am also prone to suicidal thinking.
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You are probably into an anger-related depression. This depression is also goaded by a feeling of rejection, which you may have suffered throughout your life. This rejection is usually founded in your family of origin, and is somewhat manifest in some descriptions you have given already. This is not to find fault in your parents: they may have done a lot of things with good intentions but may have inadvertently set up rejection. If you go way back, and see if there was any rejection prenatally or postnatally (again all this with intention or without), the child will pick up the sensation or feel like he is not wanted or even rejected. As you can see, I am presuming all this. You will have to give it substance, if you so have the substance. Without reaching to any conclusions, just indulge in this thought to see if there is any semblance of truth to explore it further. Your parents may throw light on this but don?t share too much of what I saying until it has been verified. Also find out, if there was an abortion or miscarriage before or after you were born. Whether you were wanted by both parents at birth. Whether they expected a female child and were disappointed that you were a boy. How long were you breastfed by mom etc? These will all throw some light on my proposal of rejection, if there is any truth. With regard to the depression, if you have depression then there are some major ramifications to take into account. I believe there may be some genetic predisposition or there has been some childhood issue, related to anger, that needs urgent attention. You must go and meet with a counselor immediately and if that person advises that you meet with a doctor you must do so and cooperate to your utmost. Please visit these professionals along with your parents. In the meantime please do the following sincerely because you could resolve the problem better with good cooperation: Have a good night?s sleep, have a good breakfast of more proteins, meditate often, remain free of stress, eat a lot of fiber, nuts, avocado, exercise regularly, eat dark chocolate, do Yoga meditation exercises, spend time in nature or gardening, etc. I suggest you do the opposite of what this depression makes you feel like doing (actually, not doing): you will need to fight this condition. You must become active; stay upright during the daylight time; meet people; never sleep during the day, wake up by 6 am every day, play some active games, especially contact games, do physical exercises, talk to people and join some social clubs, attend Yoga classes etc. Watch sitcoms on TV or comedies and cheer yourself up. Go for excursions in groups, for outings, camps, conferences, and religious conventions. Get a pet dog and spend time training it, exercising it and relating to it. Expose yourself to some sunlight every day, at least, 30 minutes but not in the scorching heat. Whatever happens, please incorporate these three important adaptations in your life: always be responsible, be respectful, and be functional. If you did these three, lots of things will go well in life. Please pray and have faith in God to alleviate your sufferings. Don?t wait for others to help. Use your own motivation, which might be at its lowest, but persevere and win this battle. Above all to be really happy, you need to live in love and for love. Learn all about emotions and how to handle them and that will get you out of the depression rather easily and quickly. A counselor is there only to facilitate you, all the hard word must come from you, and your cooperation with that person is very critical for your success. Be positive every day and learn to be contented with what you have. Do some left brain exercises: it is the happy brain. Here are a few suggestions: shut your left nostril and breathe, move your eyes from right to left and vice versa for at least half a minute at a time, and do calisthenic exercises with some form of counting, regularly. Whatever happens please cooperate with the therapy and do not discontinue until the condition is completely resolved. Â
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