I have stress problem and I have lots of fear and not going anywhere because of this problem.

Dr. Saul PereiraPsychologist46yrs exp

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The stress that you feel is not dependent on the stressor: It is entirely dependent on your perception of stress. Change your perception, there is no stress: it?s like looking at a glass half full or half empty. Life is difficult no doubt, as a general rule, but what we do adds to the stress in our response. We add to the stress of life instead of reducing it or learning to deal with it. Many of us follow a policy of avoidance. We cannot do that all of our lives. So the first thing to do is to change your perception. For example, look at it as a challenge that you would like to meet with a positive outlook. See everything as a gift from God to perform as though you are doing it for Him. God never gives us work to do beyond our capacity. Build a good constitution mentally, emotionally and physically to combat stress. Eat healthily, sleep well, and exercise regularly. Talk about your emotions regularly to a good friend every day. Learn stress management techniques, which is all about expressing your feelings in appropriate ways. Do Yoga and meditation. Pray every day to God to give you the strength, and offer your work as a prayer to Him ? you will give your best and you will feel so satisfied when you do it well. At work you must learn to delegate much or some of your work to subordinates. If you do not trust, you will find it difficult to delegate. You need to examine if your work is too stressful for various reasons. It is the one place you will be spending the greatest part of your awake life, more than even with your family! This being the case any stress there can take a severe toll: the stress in the work is mostly related to relationships. We are always into relationships and you need to find a very amicable way to interact with people. You cannot avoid people all your life: no man is an island! If it is people related, you will need to examine whether you are the cause or others the cause. If it has to do with workload, then you will need to discuss that with your colleagues first and if they think you are justified, then you will have to take it to the immediate boss. If it is injustice in the work spot, you will need to discuss it with the HR department. If you feel that you are doing more than you can manage or are qualified for, again you can consult the HR department. If you are emotionally distraught, then there may be some work for you to do with a counselor. This is where stress is mostly felt. When you do not express feelings you will land up with stress. Check what feelings you are not dealing with and then tackle that to find relief which is a permanent solution. To resolve it you need to deal with the unexpressed feelings which may have become a habit from childhood. Meet with a counselor and that person will help you process your feelings and find ways to express them once and for all and give you permanent relief. You will see an immediate change for the better. 

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