I am 22 years old female mam. Often I am getting uncontrollable anger for silly reasons. In anger im trying 2 suicide also. please tell me how to control my anger?

Dr. Jagadeesan M.S.Psychiatrist13yrs exp

96% (8367 ratings)

Ask Free Question

I will give 10 tips to control anger, if it does not work consult a psychiatrist. All the best. 1. Think before you speak In the heat of the moment, it's easy to say something you'll later regret. Take a few moments to collect your thoughts before saying anything — and allow others involved in the situation to do the same. 2. Once you're calm, express your anger As soon as you're thinking clearly, express your frustration in an assertive but nonconfrontational way. State your concerns and needs clearly and directly, without hurting others or trying to control them. 3. Get some exercise Physical activity can help reduce stress that can cause you to become angry. If you feel your anger escalating, go for a brisk walk or run, or spend some time doing other enjoyable physical activities. 4. Take a timeout Timeouts aren't just for kids. Give yourself short breaks during times of the day that tend to be stressful. A few moments of quiet time might help you feel better prepared to handle what's ahead without getting irritated or angry. 5. Identify possible solutions Instead of focusing on what made you mad, work on resolving the issue at hand. Does your child's messy room drive you crazy? Close the door. Is your partner late for dinner every night? Schedule meals later in the evening — or agree to eat on your own a few times a week. Remind yourself that anger won't fix anything and might only make it worse. 6. Stick with 'I' statements To avoid criticizing or placing blame — which might only increase tension — use "I" statements to describe the problem. Be respectful and specific. For example, say, "I'm upset that you left the table without offering to help with the dishes, instead of, "You never do any housework. 7. Don't hold a grudge Forgiveness is a powerful tool. If you allow anger and other negative feelings to crowd out positive feelings, you might find yourself swallowed up by your own bitterness or sense of injustice. But if you can forgive someone who angered you, you might both learn from the situation. It's unrealistic to expect everyone to behave exactly as you want at all times. 8. Use humor to release tension Lightening up can help diffuse tension. Use humor to help you face what's making you angry and, possibly, any unrealistic expectations you have for how things should go. Avoid sarcasm, though — it can hurt feelings and make things worse. 9. Practice relaxation skills When your temper flares, put relaxation skills to work. Practice deep-breathing exercises, imagine a relaxing scene, or repeat a calming word or phrase, such as, "Take it easy. You might also listen to music, write in a journal or do a few yoga poses — whatever it takes to encourage relaxation. 10. Know when to seek help Learning to control anger is a challenge for everyone at times. Consider seeking help for anger issues if your anger seems out of control, causes you to do things you regret or hurts those around you. 

1 person found this helpful

Dr. Sajeev KumarGeneral Physician32yrs exp

90% (21577 ratings)

Ask Free Question

Anger management: 10 tips to tame your temper ANGER: There is a saying "Frustration begets anger and anger begets aggression." Direct anger, is expressed toward the object perceived as the cause of the frustration. If a machine does not work, you might hit it or kick it. If someone gets in your way, you could verbally threaten them or push them aside. If the source of the frustration is too powerful or threatening for direct aggression, displaced aggression is often used. The aggression is redirected toward a less threatening and more available object. An angry person often acts without thinking. The person has given in to the frustration and they have given up restraint. Anger can be a healthy response if it motivates us to positive action but all too often the actions we engage in when angry are destructive. Indeed, if we could see a videotape of ourselves getting angry, the humiliation might well help cure us of anger. When you feel frustration building, you have to practice learned responses that lead to healthy actions instead of destructive ones. GIVING UP: Giving up on a goal can be productive if the goal is truly out of reach. However, more often giving up (quitting or being apathetic) is another form of giving in to frustration. When repeatedly frustrated, people can drop out of school, quit jobs, or move away. Apathy is giving up all of your goals, so you cannot be frustrated by trying to reach them. We live in difficult time and we have to be persistent in order to accomplish. Consider how many projects you began, and then gave up, because you became frustrated and lost patience. Make a list of things you started and quit because they seemed too difficult. Now calculate the disappointment and loss you suffered by not dealing with the frustration in a more healthy way. Try to remember that quitters never win, and winners never quit. Losing your temper means you're a quitter. LOSS OF CONFIDENCE: is a terrible frequent side effect of giving up and not fulfilling your goal. A loss of self-confidence and self-esteem, means that If we quit once, then the next time we plan a goal, we may not be able to accurately assess our ability to carry it out and we stop trusting ourselves and our own abilities. This became a self-fulfilling and self-destructive attitude. You need to be able to learn that when the going gets tough, you say to yourself "It is worth it!" and by following through, it not only gets the job done, but it builds self-confidence. STRESS: is the "wear and tear" our body and mind experiences as we adjust to the frustrations our continually changing environment. Too frequently, extreme, or prolonged frustration and stress strains us and generates distress signals. Our body experiences distress signals in a variety of ways, often in the form of: irritability, anger, fatigue anxiety, headache, depression, stomach aches, hypertension, migraines, ulcers, heart attacks, or colitis. DEPRESSION: Depression can affect almost every aspect of your life. It affects people of all ages, income, race, and cultures. Depression can affect the way you eat and sleep the way you feel about yourself, the way one think about things, and the way you interact with others. While we all feel depression at various appropriate times in our lives, excess or inappropriate depression cannot be easily dismissed or wished away. OTHER REACTIONS: abuse of drugs & alcohol is self-destructive and usually futile attempt at dealing with frustration, as are many eating and weight problems and addictions Whenever the immediate effects of the addictive behaviour wear off, users find themselves back in the same, or even worse, frustrating situation. Anger is among the gamut of emotions we exhibit as a reaction to a situation, and it is a 'normal' emotion too as long as it is kept under control. Some people have the propensity to explode when pushed to the extreme. They keep swallowing their emotions until they can finally do it no more, and erupt like a volcano. Others dealing with extreme anger are like a ticking time bomb. You'll never know what you unwittingly say or do can trigger an explosion. In either case, anger that cannot be controlled comes with a physical reaction. Your heart beats faster preparing you for both action and reaction. Your breathing quickens. You may clench your fist, tighten your shoulders and go into a defensive position. The problem arises out of the fact that it is almost impossible to feel anger and empathy at the same time. An angry person is seldom sensitive to the wellbeing of his victim, and hence may lash out verbally and sometimes physically. Such things done in the heat of the moment mostly leaves us with regrets. So here are a few ways to deal with extreme anger. 1. Approve it / Acknowledge it: The first step in solving a problem is recognizing that you have one. The fundamental problem here is that people believe they are on the right track and refuse to budge from their views. It is essential to realize that this step is not about deciding whether you are right or wrong, but acknowledging the fact that your reaction to the situation can be channelled in a better way. When getting someone to acknowledge their anger problem, be careful as to not use negative words like wrong, false and shouldn't. Instead, influence with positive words like can and should. Instead of saying 'You are wrong to react like this', you can say, 'I understand what you are feeling. Is there a way we can resolve this situation?' 2. Understand / recognize the signs: Once you know that your problems exist, you can try devising ways that will work for you in dealing with the situation. You can count to 100 to calm yourself or simply decide to not speak until you can calm yourself. Knowing that you may enter into an argument in a situation, you can list down the points that you feel strongly about and discuss each of them one by one. Working your way through a finite list gives a better opportunity to reach closure at the end. 3. Free the mind/Find ways to let it go: Not all arguments end in closure. A lot of unsaid justifications cloud our mind repeatedly leaving us seething from the inside. Research has shown that the normal or neurological anger response lasts less than two seconds. Beyond that it takes a strong will to stay angry. Once you realize how much your anger is consuming your mind, decide to free your mind with meditation and other calming exercises. Tell yourself that some people and issues simply don't deserve your anger, emotion, reaction or time. If you or someone you know is suffering from anger management issues, consult me on this site 

0 person found this helpful